Ad Astra

Release Date: September 20, 2019

Watch Date: February 25, 2023

 

    I didn’t think it was possible to be offended by whether or not a movie was boring, but it is, and Bob was.

    This movie was advertised as being about space exploration, discovering alien life. That is not what it is. What it is, is a highly realistic depiction of what life would be like if space exploration was part of our every day. What it is, is an introspective look on the relationship between a father and son, and how that effects how a man determines his self worth. What it is, is about fighting a space baboon.

    There’s not much to say because I feel like this movie wasted my time trying to be deep, and important, and failing on both counts, and I don’t want to further waste my time discussing it.

    The music is slow, the pacing is slow, most of the dialogue is an internal monologue by Roy, and he speaks slowly and methodically so that he can continued to be cleared for missions without being shown to have any mental health problems.

    It’s boring. It’s so boring.

    I mean, I wasn’t offended by it’s boringness, but it is boring.

    Don’t be lured in by false advertisements, this is not a movie you want to watch, unless you are really, really optimistic that it’s message – which is shallow at best – might resonate with you.

    And for my sake, please don’t mention it’s existence to Bob, because the mere memory that we wasted a night watching this is likely to ruin his entire day.