The Alligator People

Release Date: July 22, 1959

Watch Date: March 15, 2023

 

    Our first horror movie.

    I hate it. I would hate this movie even if it was good. I hate horror movies. I don’t see the appeal. Who scares themselves for fun? Who wants to be scared? I have generalized anxiety disorder. I’m scared all the time already? Why would anyone want to make elicit that feeling on purpose? My husband. Hiding out every October while he does his annual slasher film marathon, that’s my own annual tradition. He’s excited that come this October, I won’t be able to avoid some level of horror. I’m hopeful that Disney Halloween movies aren’t as bad as the ones he watches regularly.

    But this film is so early and so campy that we decided to not really qualify it as a Halloween movie, though we probably could have. So here it is – and we’re watching it knowing full well it will make me miserable. But it makes him happy. He was so excited. He shouldn’t have been.

    This movie is like every other cheesy, campy monster movie of it’s time. A tortured monster. A beautiful woman is terrified or in love with the monster, or both. A strange scientist. A human who might be the true monster.

    Our main villain, since we know it’s not the monster, is a man who hates alligators. That’s his only thing. I mean, other than his willingness to sexually assault people. But mostly, it’s a hatred of alligators. It’s basically the only thing he talks about every time he’s on screen. It’d be annoying in a better movie, but in this one it’s just ridiculous and laughable.

    I like the way this story is told, whether or not you believe in repressed memories. You probably don’t believe in alligator people, so suspend your disbelief a little bit. I actually really like the ethics demonstrated by the doctors treating our female lead. Her story is not to be believed, but it does not effect her life. Why destroy the life she’s built, when she’s happy and gainfully employed and make her process trauma she’s handling just fine on her own. So they decide to let her be. Is that something a real life psychiatrist would do? No idea. But it’s a kindness in this film and I appreciate it.

    If you’re a huge fan of horror films, you will probably not enjoy this film. But if you like campy, cheesy, B-movies, if you like the ridiculous, the absurd, the worst alligator mask you’ve ever seen, then this is absolutely the film for you. It will make you laugh, it will make you wonder what people were smoking when it was conceived. It’s fun. Stupid, dumb. But fun.

    Still a horror movie, and I still hated it.